13:59:02 From James Elliott to All panelists : Good afternoon, I can only stay for half the meeting, I'll have to wait for the recording to see the other half. 14:01:16 From Susie Kelley : Hey! 14:01:19 From Colleen Hooks : Hi! 14:01:28 From Hope Willis to All panelists : Hello. 14:01:30 From Melanie Higgins : Hello everyone! 14:01:30 From Colleen Hooks : hello 14:01:32 From Colleen Hooks : Hello! 14:01:32 From Regina Burgess to James Elliott and all panelists : Okay, James 14:01:33 From Colleen Hooks : hi 14:01:34 From Laurlei Kolvitz : Hi! 14:01:34 From Colleen Hooks : Hello! 14:01:35 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : hi 14:01:36 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Hi! 14:01:38 From Colleen Hooks : Howdy everyone! 14:01:38 From Colleen Hooks : Hi! 14:01:39 From Susie Del Rosario to All panelists : Hello 14:01:46 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Hello! 14:01:48 From Colleen Hooks : hi! 14:01:49 From Elisabeth Ball : Hello! 14:01:49 From Colleen Hooks : Hello! 14:01:49 From Colleen Hooks : Hello! 14:01:50 From Patricia Camizzi : Hello 14:01:53 From Colleen Hooks : Hello everyone :) 14:01:54 From Silence Bourn to All panelists : Hi! 14:01:58 From Colleen Hooks : Hello 14:01:59 From Charlotte Barnes : Hello to everyone! 14:02:09 From Christina Adelman to All panelists : Hi 14:02:15 From Kristin Kroger to All panelists : pushy 14:02:17 From Colleen Hooks : Knowing when to say NO 14:02:19 From Charlotte Barnes : speaking up 14:02:20 From Colleen Hooks : Getting your point across 14:02:21 From Elisabeth Ball : Unafraid 14:02:21 From Sharon to All panelists : Hello, everyone 14:02:22 From Colleen Hooks : Voicing your opinion 14:02:22 From Colleen Hooks : Being proactive. 14:02:23 From Hope Willis to All panelists : honest 14:02:23 From Emily Mann : advocating for yourself 14:02:23 From Iris Velasquez : Being direct 14:02:24 From Elizabeth Rodriguez to All panelists : Strong 14:02:24 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : linda campbell hi 14:02:24 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Voicing your opinion 14:02:24 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : Boundaries 14:02:25 From Colleen Hooks : The ability to share your thoughts and ideas even when it is uncomfortable 14:02:25 From Blake Robinson to All panelists : Getting things done 14:02:25 From Susan Crutchfield to All panelists : speaking up 14:02:25 From Colleen Hooks : Having boundaries 14:02:27 From Colleen Hooks : B@3ch 14:02:27 From Colleen Hooks : Not getting walked over 14:02:28 From Colleen Hooks : Being sure of yourself. 14:02:29 From Colleen Hooks : proactive. 14:02:31 From Colleen Hooks : Expressing your opinions tactfully. 14:02:33 From James Elliott : standing up for me and my staff. 14:02:41 From Colleen Hooks : Standing up for yourself 14:02:49 From Susie Kelley : Keeping my foot down! 14:02:49 From Regina Burgess to James Elliott and all panelists : Handout: https://www.plan.lib.fl.us/files/20200422_handout.pdf 14:02:51 From Colleen Hooks : Brave.. Having confidence 14:03:01 From Colleen Hooks : Confident 14:03:25 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : I shared my link with my staff - so they all show my name haha sorry! 14:03:41 From Colleen Hooks : Strong 14:03:47 From James Elliott : compromise is often called for. 14:08:59 From Charlotte Barnes : I agree with you about forceful--that word puts me off a bit. 14:09:31 From Amy Hauptman : I did not get the handout. Is there a link? 14:09:45 From James Elliott : https://www.plan.lib.fl.us/files/20200422_handout.pdf 14:09:51 From Regina Burgess : https://www.plan.lib.fl.us/files/20200422_handout.pdf 14:09:59 From Amy Hauptman : Thanks 14:10:19 From Charlotte Barnes : C 14:10:23 From Colleen Hooks : Family 14:10:24 From Colleen Hooks : Customers at work 14:10:36 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : strangers 14:10:38 From Colleen Hooks : Disrespecful customers 14:10:39 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : friends 14:10:40 From Blake Robinson : Taking on too many responsibilities at work 14:10:44 From Nancy Newsome : with forceful people 14:10:45 From Colleen Hooks : Communicating with my parents 14:10:45 From Colleen Hooks : Friends 14:10:46 From Colleen Hooks : When your new at work 14:10:46 From Laurlei Kolvitz : people I don't know 14:10:47 From Colleen Hooks : Individuals with strong opinions. 14:10:51 From Colleen Hooks : Family and difficult patrons 14:10:51 From Charlotte Barnes : Sometimes patrons can definitely be a challenge 14:10:52 From Colleen Hooks : Difficult customers 14:10:54 From Susan Crutchfield to All panelists : supervisor 14:10:55 From Hope Willis to All panelists : family and administration 14:10:55 From Susie Kelley : Family members 14:10:58 From Colleen Hooks : everyone lol 14:11:00 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : Colleagues 14:11:01 From Emily Mann : Family members and boss 14:11:02 From Colleen Hooks : Patrons. 14:11:02 From Gracine Wiggins : Friends, family, coworkers, patrons.. 14:11:03 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : Your boss 14:11:07 From Colleen Hooks : Agreed individuals with string opinions (bossy) 14:11:07 From Colleen Hooks : The family or roommates that we're stuck with during quarantine 14:11:17 From Colleen Hooks : Challenging patrons 14:11:27 From Susie Del Rosario to All panelists : colleagues, students patrons family and friends 14:11:28 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : not taking on to much and knowing when to say no. 14:11:38 From Colleen Hooks : When your short 14:12:24 From Colleen Hooks : people run over you 14:12:25 From Patricia Camizzi : Trying to be polite 14:12:27 From Colleen Hooks : Don't want to hurt people's feelings 14:12:28 From Colleen Hooks : if you don't 14:12:34 From Colleen Hooks : Wanting to be "nice" 14:12:34 From Colleen Hooks : Avoiding conflict 14:12:36 From Janet Schulte : Fear of how people will respond 14:12:36 From Silence Bourn to All panelists : Feeling vulnerable 14:12:37 From James Elliott : low self confidence in face to face interactions 14:12:37 From Christina Adelman to All panelists : don't want make people mad 14:12:38 From Gracine Wiggins : Because I don't want to be taken advantage of 14:12:39 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Hm, I brought to be polite above all things 14:12:40 From Anika Crayon : Too much of a people pleaser 14:12:44 From Elisabeth Ball : Wanting things to go smoothly 14:12:45 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : which is detrimental 14:12:49 From James Elliott : I am more assertive online than I am in person! 14:12:49 From Colleen Hooks : Not wanting to seem like I'm disagreeable. 14:12:50 From Colleen Hooks : Not sure about what boundaries I can set/are appropriate 14:12:50 From Blake Robinson : I'm conscious of the power imbalance at work. 14:12:51 From Colleen Hooks : I don't want to get in trouble :-( 14:12:51 From Colleen Hooks : Being judged 14:12:52 From Laurlei Kolvitz : I agree... self confidence 14:12:57 From Amy Hauptman : I think it is because girls are taught to be a people pleaser. 14:12:57 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : My desire to be likeable 14:12:58 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Being misunderstood 14:12:59 From Colleen Hooks : reinforcing policies 14:13:00 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : I don't like saying no. I'm a people pleaser 14:13:02 From Charlotte Barnes : Sometimes you are afraid of getting in trouble in a work situation (people could misunderstand intent/meaning), et 14:13:05 From Colleen Hooks : Don’t want to hurt feelings 14:13:05 From Sharon to All panelists : I don't want hurt people feeling or do not want feel wrong 14:13:06 From Debra Humphrey : being judged 14:13:18 From Colleen Hooks : not want to hurt their feelings 14:13:19 From Colleen Hooks : Being misunderstood and my responses being passed along and taken out of context. 14:13:27 From Emily Mann : I'm a pushover, though trying hard not to be. 14:13:28 From Susie Kelley : Others stepping over me! 14:13:32 From Elizabeth Rodriguez : being looked down on 14:13:34 From Iris Velasquez : Not wanting to get in trouble 14:13:47 From Charlotte Barnes : Emily, I am the same. 14:14:06 From Kori Howze : I agree 14:14:27 From Colleen Hooks : I think being judged, or sound I don’t know what I am talking about. 14:14:28 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : I tend to be a doormat. I hate it but it is my default. 14:14:46 From Colleen Hooks : Being a minority 14:14:46 From Colleen Hooks : Everyone looks at a situation from a different perspective. Their perspective and mine may both be correct. 14:14:55 From Amy Hauptman : They think nice equates begin a pushover. 14:15:19 From Colleen Hooks : yes, Amy 14:15:31 From Colleen Hooks : Yes, Colleen 14:16:32 From Kori Howze : Respect? 14:16:34 From Susie Kelley : Standing my ground! 14:16:35 From Colleen Hooks : Stop being stepped on 14:16:35 From Elizabeth Rodriguez : being heard and respected 14:16:35 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : I think people would respect me more 14:16:36 From Colleen Hooks : Being more confident in social settings 14:16:37 From Janet Schulte : improved confidence 14:16:39 From Colleen Hooks : Stress free 14:16:39 From Iris Velasquez : More confidence 14:16:40 From Colleen Hooks : you are heard 14:16:46 From Amy Hauptman : Being more comfortable 14:16:49 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : Establishing a boundary 14:16:50 From Susan Crutchfield to All panelists : better relationship with supervisor confident 14:16:52 From Kori Howze : I agree 14:16:53 From Colleen Hooks : Better boundaries 14:16:56 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : confidence in myself 14:16:57 From Hope Willis to All panelists : better relationships 14:16:58 From Gracine Wiggins : Understanding another viewpoint 14:17:02 From Colleen Hooks : Being more true to myself by sharing my ideas.opinions 14:17:02 From Colleen Hooks : Less stress. 14:17:04 From Elisabeth Ball : Not having to circle back and fix a problem later. 14:17:05 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : Confidence. 14:17:11 From Blake Robinson : More forthright relationships with colleagues. 14:17:14 From Colleen Hooks : Feel good 14:17:14 From Anika Crayon : not feeling the need to call for help, when it can be done alone 14:17:19 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Confidence to stand up to others and different situations 14:17:26 From Colleen Hooks : Being able to hold my own in a tough conversation 14:17:42 From Colleen Hooks : I'm passive and I don't like it. I wish I could say what's on my mind in the moment but I'm just not that bold because I feel it will come off aggressive. 14:17:46 From Colleen Hooks : Avoiding those moments or realizations where we wish we would have said something while the opportunity was there. 14:18:18 From Colleen Hooks : I can contribute ideas to the conversation which may prove to be valuable. 14:18:50 From Colleen Hooks : How do differentiate between being assertive and not being bossy. While also not being aggressive? 14:19:02 From Amy Hauptman : Good for you Linda. :-) 14:19:04 From Colleen Hooks : wow, you were very brave 14:19:08 From Colleen Hooks : Wow 14:19:13 From Elizabeth Rodriguez : that is amazing! 14:19:25 From Elisabeth Ball : Truth to power. 14:19:49 From Elizabeth Rodriguez : I wish I could have that strength, especially with medical professionals. 14:19:52 From Heather Bryan to All panelists : Having the back bone for the ones you love is a big deal....we should all love ourselves, too. 14:19:58 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Yes. You have to stand up for yourself 14:20:01 From Charlotte Barnes : So di 14:20:08 From Charlotte Barnes : So do i 14:20:24 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : We need to stand up for ourselves and be advocates for those that need us to stand up for them. Good for you! 14:20:43 From James Elliott : Same here 14:21:28 From Heather Bryan : You shut down 14:21:42 From Charlotte Barnes : Sorry about my typos. I had laptop issues and had to borrow a laptop. I'm getting used to this smaller keyboard. 14:22:41 From Heather Bryan : It would be a huge difference 14:22:50 From James Elliott : Charlotte, I went out and bought a $10 usb keyboard from Walmart and plugged it into my laptop so I could have a full size one to use! Also got a mouse. Had to buy a USB hub to plug them both in, but it works! 14:22:55 From Heather Bryan : baby steps 14:23:35 From Sean Cavanagh-Voss : where is that list? 14:23:59 From Colleen Hooks : How do you differentiate between bossy, assertive and aggressive? 14:25:40 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : How do you assertively deflate an aggressive person? 14:25:42 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Given your experience, do you feel as though women are more likely to be called "bossy" than men? 14:25:47 From Colleen Hooks : I think the tone differentiates the two 14:26:52 From Colleen Hooks : I did too in previous jobs. 14:26:55 From Colleen Hooks : I used to deal with that in my previous corporate position as well. 14:27:23 From Charlotte Barnes : I'm awful in social situations where I don't know anyone. I'm not good at asserting myself in groups of strangers. 14:27:49 From Colleen Hooks : I’m in the same boat as you, Charlotte! 14:28:14 From Patricia Camizzi : Charlotte I"m the same way. 14:28:14 From Olivia Shaff : I am the same, Charlotte! 14:28:29 From Charlotte Barnes : So am I, Linda! 14:28:31 From Blake Robinson : Me too, Charlotte. I have no idea what to do at free-form, unstructured conference activities. 14:28:45 From Anika Crayon : I have this issue with all my food allergies when eating out. I've been asked if they're allergies or if I just don't like the food. I feel like just eating whatever and taking emergency meds later. 14:28:53 From Susan Crutchfield : I am severely hard of hearing so have a problem asking people to repeat themselves 14:29:17 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : I sometimes try to break the ice with comedy but that may backfire sometimes. 14:29:18 From Susie Kelley : I'm more assertive when it comes to family than others! 14:29:19 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : What they think about us is none of our business, but it can be challenging to not engage when people are aggressive towards us. 14:29:51 From Blake Robinson : Sounds great. Thanks, Linda. 14:29:54 From Olivia Shaff : Same, Susie. :) 14:29:55 From Heather Bryan : Same here Susie 14:30:15 From Regina Burgess : Webinar: How to Get the Most Out of a Conference with Linda Bruno: https://www.plan.lib.fl.us/events/webinar-how-to-get-the-most-out-of-a-conference-with-linda-bruno/ 14:30:15 From Colleen Hooks : Oh, to the person with food allergies....speak up. Don't get sick. I know from experience. 14:31:01 From Susie Kelley : However, if I'm accused of doing something wrong and I didn't, than I will stand up for myself! 14:31:19 From James Elliott to All panelists : Apologies, but I have to leave. :-( 14:31:50 From Susie Kelley : Right! 14:31:52 From Colleen Hooks : Yes, those family situations are difficult for me. 14:32:00 From Kori Howze : Period! 14:32:01 From Colleen Hooks : I often feel guilty when I stand up for myself too. 14:32:20 From Laura Keeble : Me too Susie. 14:32:38 From Colleen Hooks : How do you state something assertive to someone who you know is sensitive and can take it to heart? 14:33:12 From Olivia Shaff : Me, too Colleen 14:33:50 From Amy Hauptman : I am a relatively new supervisor. I find it difficult when I have staff who will not take my direction or refuse to do things. 14:34:39 From Colleen Hooks : Sounds like you were speaking your truth and telling her that you care about her. 14:35:05 From Sean Cavanagh-Voss : I feel like I act assertive in situations but it's a mask. Like I haven't internalized the thought process. So, if I get called out or someone is combative, then the whole act falls apart. 14:35:34 From Charlotte Barnes : Sean, I can relate. 14:35:50 From Laura Keeble : Ditto Sean. 14:36:05 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : Someone had to remind me that I am not responsible for my employees deciding not to do the work, I am only responsible for how I respond to it. 14:36:08 From Colleen Hooks : I frequently think what is fair to me when I'm assertive. Usually that helps me stand firm. 14:36:18 From Colleen Hooks : Same. I also have a difficult time having a conversation with someone being aggressive. I always back down or roll over. 14:36:23 From Heather Bryan : Exactly, I freeze. totally counterproductive 14:36:40 From Laurlei Kolvitz : Several years ago the Basic Assertive Rights were shared with me. To make the change to be assertive doesn't happen overnight. It takes practice until it comes more naturally. Here is a link: https://uplifttherapy.com/basic-assertive-rights/ 14:36:51 From Susie Kelley : I was just in the situation where I was assertive and stood my ground with a house guest on my house rules! I felt heart broken when I had to tell the person they had to leave my home! 14:36:58 From Colleen Hooks : I choose not to engage in arguing. I learned that from my sister. 14:37:09 From Colleen Hooks : Wow 14:37:25 From Kori Howze : Choose not to engage!..Period@ 14:38:14 From Blake Robinson : What a terrible neighbor. 14:43:52 From Colleen Hooks : LOL 14:44:09 From Colleen Hooks : How to control body language Linda, specially face expressions? 14:45:30 From Susie Kelley : My husband always tells me that he needs to have a camera ready to catch my facial expressions! 14:45:50 From Colleen Hooks : I practice this with my kids 14:46:35 From Susie Kelley : My husband says I roll my voice! 14:46:48 From Amy Hauptman : I've been meditating and I find it easier to refocus 14:47:15 From Colleen Hooks : I used to withdraw with family to keep the peace 14:49:07 From Colleen Hooks : Colleen, I do that with my family 14:51:00 From Janet Schulte : I over-apologize constantly. I need to practice that one! 14:51:10 From Sean Cavanagh-Voss : me too 14:51:10 From Amy Hauptman : Me too 14:51:25 From Olivia Shaff : me too! 14:51:35 From Colleen Hooks : That’s the WORST 14:51:41 From Colleen Hooks : ‘No offense' 14:52:01 From Colleen Hooks : I do that 14:52:39 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : that makes you grow, it's not easy to ask for forgiveness 14:52:59 From Amy Hauptman : They say it's better to thank people rather than apologizing. Instead of, " I'm sorry I'm late. Thank you for waiting." 14:52:59 From Colleen Hooks : I apologize for things I can't control...such as I'm sorry you're sick. 14:53:21 From Colleen Hooks : Right. 14:53:47 From Colleen Hooks : True!! 14:53:58 From Amy Hauptman : Lol 14:54:04 From Colleen Hooks : lol 14:54:06 From Colleen Hooks : lol!! 14:54:11 From Colleen Hooks : lol 14:54:53 From Colleen Hooks : I have a folder like this. It's titled "Smile" 14:54:55 From Colleen Hooks : Haha. I keep mines, too 14:55:25 From Colleen Hooks : that's a great idea, a kuddos journal. 14:56:09 From Danielle Haight-Mueller to All panelists : I struggle with accepting credit for positive feedback and especially showing that I have received that feedback for performance reviews. How do you find the assertiveness/confidence to show off your accomplishments to your supervisors without feeling like you're full of yourself? 14:56:19 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Oops what was #20? 14:56:30 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you. 14:57:24 From Colleen Hooks : aww 14:57:28 From Laurlei Kolvitz : pretty! 14:57:30 From Colleen Hooks : Aww, Sweet Pea! 14:57:52 From Kori Howze : Whew! That's hard! 14:59:41 From Colleen Hooks : What was #30? 14:59:46 From Susie Kelley : What was # 30? 14:59:58 From Regina Burgess : 30. Disrespectful 15:00:05 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you. 15:00:17 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you so much! 15:00:23 From Olivia Shaff : Thank you so much!! 15:00:27 From Colleen Hooks : This was great. Thank you so much! 15:00:28 From Susie Del Rosario to All panelists : Thank you so much 15:00:28 From Amy Dickinson to All panelists : Thank you 15:00:30 From Colleen Hooks : This was great! Thank you! 15:00:30 From Blake Robinson : Thank you! 15:00:31 From Susan Crutchfield : #8? 15:00:33 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you! 15:00:34 From Colleen Hooks : thanks 15:00:34 From Selina Raghunath : Thank you! 15:00:35 From Kori Howze : Thank you! This was so much fun!! 15:00:36 From Iris Velasquez to All panelists : Thank you so much, this was great! 15:00:36 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you! 15:00:37 From Patricia Camizzi : Thank you LInda 15:00:38 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you 15:00:38 From Amy Hauptman : Thanks 15:00:39 From Sindhu Gopal : Thank you very much! 15:00:40 From Heather Bryan : Thank you!! 15:00:40 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you! 15:00:41 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : This was great 15:00:41 From Janet Schulte : Thank you for your time, really enjoyed this webinar! 15:00:41 From Colleen Hooks : thanks 15:00:41 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you! 15:00:45 From Silence Bourn to All panelists : Thank you! 15:00:46 From Sean Cavanagh-Voss : Thank you so much, Linda!!! 15:00:46 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you Linda. 15:00:47 From Colleen Hooks : was good 15:00:47 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thanks 15:00:48 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you! 15:00:48 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you Linda! 15:00:51 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you 15:00:51 From Colleen Hooks : thanks 15:00:51 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you and stay safe! 15:00:52 From Laura Keeble : #26? 15:00:52 From Susie Kelley : Thank you! I enjoyed this webinar! Have a great day! 15:00:53 From Christina Adelman to All panelists : thanks! 15:00:53 From Susan Crutchfield : thank you great webinar 15:00:54 From Charlotte Barnes : Thanks, Linda! Awesome as always! 15:00:54 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you! 15:00:54 From Colleen Hooks : Thanks so much! 15:01:03 From Lisa Klopotek : thank you 15:01:06 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you 15:01:07 From Olivia Shaff : #5 15:01:08 From Colleen Hooks : thanks 15:01:09 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you! 15:01:09 From Sharon Jones : Thank you! 15:01:10 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you! 15:01:11 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you 15:01:11 From Janet Loveless : Always an insightful webinar 15:01:13 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : linda wonderful, thanks 15:01:15 From Colleen Hooks : Thank you 15:01:16 From Colleen Hooks : fantastic and so helpful 15:01:18 From Colleen Hooks : Thanks! 15:01:19 From Colleen Hooks : 3 and 4 15:01:19 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you!!! Very helpful for me 15:01:24 From Olivia Shaff : thank you! 15:01:32 From Laura Keeble : #26? 15:01:35 From Colleen Hooks : thanks 15:01:44 From Sharon Jones : Thank you! 15:01:45 From Christina Adelman to All panelists : number 6 15:02:02 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : Thank you - and sorry again, from the real Colleen! 15:02:03 From Christina Adelman to All panelists : that's what I will try to practice 15:02:08 From Laura Keeble : Thank you Linda! I appreciate you. 15:02:24 From Colleen Hooks to All panelists : +Thank you 15:02:45 From Nancy Newsome : Thank you!! One of the best!